(WILMINGTON, DE) Microsoft today settled a long-running trademark dispute with French Connection Group PLC over the use of the term “Fall Creators Update”. The Settlement amount was undisclosed, according to documents lodged with the Supreme Court earlier this morning.
In the statement of claim, French Connection Group alleged that Microsoft infringed on its hard-earned brand equity by releasing a product which was 75% similar to its own trademark.
During cross examination, Microsoft admitted that the ‘kiosk’ version of its universally acclaimed Microsoft365 suit was referred to, at least internally, as the Fall Creators Update Kiosk, or “FCUK”.
The Supreme Court found that Three Letter Acronyms were safe ground for trademark infringement, but four letters were a different kettle of fish (“DKOF”).
In response, Microsoft has started numbering its Windows Updates (again), with the latest being creatively titled “1803”. In a press release announcing the settlement, Microsoft said that its new numbering system hoped to highlight forgotten years in history. 1709 being the year of the Great Frost in Europe. 1803 being the year that Louisiana was purchased from France by the United States.
Despite rumors, there are no plans to release 1812 as Tchaikovsky has already commemorated the French invasion of Russia with an eponymous concert overture.
The numbering system also ends the hotly-contested feud over the use of an apostrophe in Fall Creators Update. While the official title had no punctuation, several commentators have suggested that “Fall Creators’ Update” would be more correct, and some comments on Twitter have even suggested that there was really only one person behind the update, and therefore it should be “Fall Creator’s Update”.
Following the debacle, nobody dares mention the word “autumn” at Microsoft.